This week, executives at Omnimedia were busy congratulating themselves on the initial success of Martha Stewart's new reality TV show, entitled Martha. The set features a versatile swing-set for home segments such as cooking, gardening and crafts, and actually encourages audience participation in an attempt to show how well Martha can connect with the average person. But despite all the celebrations surrounding the announcement, concerned staff members appeared worried about Martha's sanity yesterday, as filming of the first few episodes began.
Martha Stewart's sanity questioned during filming of new TV Show
Photo 1: Martha doles out a little prison vengeance to friends of the Pillsbury Dough Boy to teach him that he's now officially her "little bitch".
Photo 2: Martha's new culinary creation entitled "Gingerbread Prison Bitches" has begun to cause concern about exactly how well Martha is readjusting to life on the outside.
One concerned member of the set, who wished to remain anonymous, told the Daily Happy Pill that Martha appears to be suffering from "post-prison trauma", and that the domestic diva had "turned ghetto".
Gone are tasteful broaches and delicate necklaces she used to wear, according to our source. Instead, Martha turned up to the set yesterday wearing so much bling-bling and so many gold chains that she looked like Mr. T from the A-Team.
Martha's new kitchen manner is also raising a few eyebrows among her camera crew, particularly during the filming of a segment entitled The Pillsbury Cookie-Caust. "Martha kept poking the poor little fellow with her folk as she wasted his entire family one-by-one, to 'teach him a lesson'", our tearful source recalled.
Her new recipe for "Gingerbread Prison Bitches" also appears to have taken TV executives at the studio by surprise. Martha cheerfully explained to the cameras that this creation was inspired by the events of her first night in prison when two of the male guards popped by to "wish her a good night".
Martha's home crafts and helpful tips section also appears to have taken on a darker undercurrent. Instead of the usual basket weaving and flower displays, Martha showed her audience how to make a knuckle-duster from a soap spoon and how to conceal the weapon while naked.
According to our source, Martha was never the easiest person to work with, but since her return, she now rules her staff with an iron fist, announcing that she will rip anyone who questions her status as 'top dog', a "new ass-hole!"
But the worst thing according to our source is Martha's new strict policy on feminine hygiene.
"She keeps insisting that all her female staff shower together at the end of the day at the local gymnasium.", she told our reporter. "She's normally armed with a egg beater and anyone who attempts to speak up is forced to bend over to "pick up the soap!", she added with a shudder.
